Month 30: Guess how much I miss you

"Where's Daddy? I like Daddy! I want Daddy! Let's pick up Daddy, Mommy!"

That's the first thing she said in the morning and the last thing she said at night for the last two weeks. Alan's in Australia.

After a week and a half of repeating myself to Bing Bing "Daddy's away my dear. He's back on Saturday", Bing Bing started to revise her statements every morning and night:

"Daddy's not home Mommy. Mommy's here. Daddy's coming home on Saturday. Today's Monday. There's Tuesdays, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday. Daddy's home on Saturday Mommy."

"Since when could you name all the days of a week??" She took me by surprised.

"It's only Monday Mommy. Daddy's home on Saturday on a plane" Her eyes were wide open.

"How did you know Daddy's flying back on a plane??" My eyes were wide open!

"Daddy's on a plane. Vewwww flying on a plane Mommy. Daddy's not home. Mommy's here. Mommy nằm, Bing Bing nằm"

Bing Bing's a very sensitive baby since forever. She asked me to lie down with her for a little longer before she goes to sleep - just to feel a bit more secured when Daddy's not around.

One day I brought three chocolate golden coins home from a London shop on Queen Street for Bing Bing. They were lovely shiny golden chocolate coins with different sizes. Bing Bing absolutely fell in love with those. After careful consideration, Bing Bing opened the smallest one for herself and ate up

"It's so yum, Mommy! Thank you!"

"You're welcome, what about these two chocolate coins?"

"Umm, you eat this big one." - She gave the largest coin to me.

"Cool, thanks, what about this last one, shall we give it to Daddy when he's back tomorrow?"

"Yes!! This chocolate is Daddy's. I'll give it to him when he's home tomorrow." - Her eyes lit up like stars.

After about 2 minutes, "Mommy, can you open this chocolate for me. I want to eat it!"

"I thought this was Daddy's and you're giving it to him tomorrow when you see him?"

"Yes, this is Daddy's but I want it Mommy"

"I think Daddy would love it if you give it to him. Shall we wait until tomorrow, I'm sure he'll let you eat it anyway darling."

"Okay, I'll give it to him tomorrow"

After about another 2 minutes, "Can I open this Mommy?"

"Bing Bing, you want to eat it now or you want to keep it for Daddy?"

"I... I want to eat it."

"Are you sure you don't want to give it Daddy?"

"Okay, I'll give it to Daddy. Daddy likes chocolate like me." She smiled.

About three very similar conversations like that happened in a span of ten minutes. Every time Bing Bing ended up saving it for her Daddy. Finally we decided to put it away so it's not too tempting.

It was a huge development for a toddler as little as Bing Bing to learn to resist presented temptation. I remember reading a book talking about an experiment with young toddlers. They each were presented with a chocolate bar. They were told that they could either eat it now and that's it or wait for 10 minutes and they'd have two chocolate bars to eat. Only so very few toddlers manage to understand and exercise the concept of resisting temptation in exchange for a larger reward. It's then proven that later on those did wait for two chocolate bars did exceptionally well in school and out.

It's now two days since Bing Bing last skyped with her Daddy, simply because we were too busy.

"Mommy, let's call him. Do you want to talk to him?"

The moment Bing Bing saw her Daddy on the phone, she reached out her wide open arms and said

"Bần nà, bần nà Daddy" (Pick me up and carry me Daddy)

She turned to me and said

"I can't touch him, Mommy. I can't reach Daddy." - Sobbed.

They talked and talked. Very often I saw Bing Bing kissed the phone screen. She loved her Daddy so dearly. She sobbed when saying goodbye to Alan but she always slept very well the nights they talked.

Bing Bing's a really sensitive toddler. The first morning Alan left, Bing Bing was up from 3am and didn't fall back asleep. She struggled. She asked for milk. She asked for books. She asked for play dough. She was just looking for something to comfort her. That's how she got so attached to Jordan - our baby doll. Bing Bing insisted on carrying Jordan everywhere she went. Jordan was not allowed to be out of sight.

Friday night, I took Bing Bing to a pub for a colleague's leaving farewell drinks. Bing Bing was upset after about five minutes

"I don't want to be here Mommy. I want to go home with Daddy. Where's Daddy. Daddy's home today."

"He's on a plane flying home at the moment my dear. You'll see him in the morning okay?"

"I want to go home Mommy. I don't like it here."

She knew Alan was coming home. She just wanted to be home waiting for Daddy.

Now every time we mentioned Saturday, Bing Bing jumped up and hugged Daddy

"No no, Daddy, stay home don't go..." She sobbed.

It was heart breaking to see Bing Bing going through a little trauma like that. During the two weeks Alan went away, Bing Bing kissed me more often. She said she loved her Mommy more often. She took care of me the way a child could. I took care of her the way a mother did. We were best friends who comfort each other in the absence of our man. It was really special.

Now that Alan's back. She was screaming in happiness all morning with biggest grins on the face. Her heart is now full.

Month 29: A new breath of development

7am on a Saturday morning...

I gently opened the curtains in Bing Bing's room. Slowly the sun rays went through the window and filled the whole room with sunshine.

Bing Bing laughed so happily when she saw the sun lights:

"Look! Look! Mommy look! I can see the lights!"

She went on and on about the sun and the lights until we got to our car making our way to her music class. Bing Bing suddenly explained:

"Mommy! When the sun wakes up, the moon goes to sleep! I can't see the moon when the sun wakes up. The stars also go to sleep."

Alan and I were shocked. Since when could she make such long sentences and since when could she make such beautiful expression of a natural event? Bing Bing now understood the concept of reocurrence.

Auckland in August is moody. It rains in a blink of an eye before the sun shines all around and rains again without much warning. Bing Bing was playing puzzles in our living room when it started to rain.

"What are you doing near the window, Bing Bing?"

"I'm seeing the rain"

I took her up to her room for changing. As a wonderful observant she was, she looked out her window and puzzled:

"It's raining here too Mommy?!"

"When it rains I can't see the lights Mommy" - Bing Bing continued before I could explain. What a great observation I thought. She must have remembered the sun lights going through her window in the morning.

"That's right Bing Bing. Maybe the sun is taking a nap when it rains."

Bing Bing's facial expression was priceless. One curious child she was. She now was able to make connection between events. She is connecting the dots...

Alan and I have been teaching Bing Bing a variety of opposites. You know, old-new, empty-full, tall-short etc. She's been doing so great with those concepts through puzzles and comparisons. It's much easier teaching opposite concepts. It's a lot harder to teach something in between. Been teaching her the "medium" concepts for two weeks now. Usually when serving food, I asked Bing Bing if her food is hot or cold, for instance, as an exercise to learn opposites.

"Is your rice hot Bing Bing?"

"It's not hot, it's warm" - Amazing I thought.

"Is the water hot or cold Bing Bing" - I asked when I drew her a bath

"Water's not hot, it's warm" - Wonderful I have succeeded.

Similar means of "medium" concept have been introduced: three sticks with different lengths, three circles with different sizes for Bing Bing to sort out.

"This is long, this is short. This is not too long not too short" - She mumbles as she sorts

"This is big, this is small. This is not too big not too small".

Oh, how could I forget. Another new breath of development for Bing Bing this month was her ability to ask this question that made us all speechless:

"Mommy, this is my Daddy, this is not your Daddy. Where's your Daddy?"

"Ong Phong is my Daddy, dear." I answered.

"Ba Binh is your Mommy or Daddy's Mommy?" - She asked. We went speechless. How could a 2 year old ask such a difficult question involving a very complex relationship?

One last thing that has been very handy for me. Bing Bing has now understood the concept of before and after. For toddler it was impossible to grasp this simple concept. For them there is only NOW or NEVER. That's why when they want something they've gotta have it now. If it's not now it means never. So they cry no matter how hard the parents explain "you can have ice cream after dinner".

"I have my rice first and I have my sua chua okay Mommy?" - YES! She's got it.

"I sleep now and I see Elsa and Anna later okay Mommy?" - Couldn't ask for more!

It's so much easier now to make a deal and explain to Bing Bing what needs to happen first before something else can happen. She really gets it!

It was truly amazing to witness and experience Bing Bing's new level of development and knowledge. She's started asking questions like "What is this Mommy?" and while I'm excited that she asked I'm nervous that in no time it's going to be real challenging to fulfil her curious mind :)

A proud mother

Month 29: Friends

Bing Bing, as per her teacher, was one of the most popular kids at her kindergarten. This might be attributed to the fact that she was always the smallest at school; she was cute, friendly and super caring. I assumed that all the kids would play and mingle together and there would be no “close friends” at this stage of toddler development.

But…I was wrong!

Alex was quite close to Mona, a warm-hearted Romanian teacher at Bing Bing’s kindergarten, and they could talk for hours about the kids. One day, Mona asked me “Alan, do you know Finn from our class?”

Of course I know Finn. His parents drove a shiny Jeep SUV which often blocked my driveway in the morning. Finn knew me, too. I vividly remembered seeing him jump out of the car and pointed his little finger towards me, saying “Mommy, that’s Margaret’s father”. I had the impression that Finn was a sociable and well-groomed kid. As such, he was very memorable to me. So I told Mona “Of course I do. What’s the matter?”

“Finn will only come to our kindergarten three days per week starting next month. His mother told me his number one concern is that he will not be able to play with Margaret”, said Mona.

“Oh, they are good friends, aren’t they?” I asked

“Yes, Finn and Margaret are really really close. They play together; they read together, they eat together. Finn is really protective of Margaret as well. I can see they are developing into a very special friendship” – Mona answered and smiled. “Finn’s mom suggested that you should organize a playdate so that the kids can play together”.

“That sounds great.”

I then got in touch with Finn’s mom and she wrote my number on a sticker note and put it on her fridge. Finn’s family just came back from a short trip to Samoa and Rene would organize the playdate very soon. She told me that Finn didn’t let anyone touch the sticker note with my number as he was afraid that his mother might forget about the playdate…At this stage, I knew that Bing Bing had a close friend – Finn.

Three weeks ago, we invited my parents to visit Bing Bing’s kindergarten and my mum taught them how to make Vietnamese spring rolls. Sally, the Manager, told us her story with such a great excitement.

“I can’t believe that Margaret has been with us for 3 months. You know she already had a buddy right?” – said Sally

I was about to answer “Yes, it gotta be Finn” in a very cool I-knew-it-already manner, and Sally’s next sentence almost got me tumble.

“Yes yes, it’s Matt ha ha.  It was really funny. Matt came back last week from his long holiday and I greeted him at the entrance. He ignored me and, by the way, do you know what his first sentence was?” – said Sally

“Err, what did he ask you?” – Alex voiced up

“He asked me “Where’s Margaret?” – Sally said and giggled – “And then he rushed into the room to find Margaret and they had great fun building a tower together”.

I hardly knew Matt back then, and my impression of Matt was not that strong. He was really shy and quiet when we ran into each other in the hallway one morning.

I smiled whenever I thought of Bing Bing and her friends. A teacher at Bing Bing’s first kindergarten used to tell us her observation that Bing Bing was really mature in her interaction with friends. She would choose not to play with a kid who acted aggressively or unreasonably towards his/her friends. That’s why I was really happy to see that Bing Bing could make friends with other toddlers at school. For me, it meant that Bing Bing was put in a friendly environment in which toddlers knew how to play with and respect each other. More importantly, as Finn and Matt were having different personalities, it was really important for Bing Bing to appreciate such difference between her two best friends. In the long run, this would help Bing Bing develop her self-awareness and emotional intelligence. 

 

“If you take kids to a playgroup, you'll find two children who just naturally gravitate toward each other”

Marilyn Segal, American development psychologist

Month 29: "Be kind and have courage"

5pm I was already on a bus to pick up Bing Bing. When I got there, for a moment I was horrified when I heard a screaming voice blended with tears coming from where Bing Bing was standing. It was Sienna's:

"That's not my Mommy! That's Margaret's Mommy! Oh no... where's my Mommy?"

If it was a normal day, Bing Bing would have run to me, greeted me with her biggest smile, given me her warmest hug and her most gentle kiss. That day she gave me a quickest hug and her most hurried kiss. She was having a concern - Sienna, her friend was crying.

Bing Bing rushed back beside Sienna. She gave Sienna a long hug. She patted on Sienna's shoulder. She bent down to the level that Sienna was sitting. Bing Bing showed her most concerned face and sweetly asked:

"Are you okay Sienna? Do you need anything? Here you go, do you want to read a book?"

Vanessa - their teacher showed up and gave Sienna comfort. Vanessa couldn't help noticing the act of kindness that Bing Bing had showed.

"Margaret, that's very kind of you to care for your friend Sienna. Thank you. You're such a sweetie, sweetheart."

I was very pleased to see that. In fact, I have noticed that act of kindness from Bing Bing in many situations. Before I could make a comment, Vanessa turned to me:

"I think Margaret can make a wonderful doctor!"

"Oh? How so?" - I puzzled.

"Margaret is a highly independent child. She likes to concentrate doing her own work most of the time. But if there's a situation arising - a child crying, a kid screaming, a friend falling, Margaret is always the first to stop her work, come to her friend, show her empathy and provide comfort. Until the child has calmed down, Margaret gets back to her work quickly."

"That's definitely something that I've picked up from Margaret too. She was playing by herself with great focus. When she heard me chopping chicken loudly on the chopping board, she ran to the kitchen and asked me to be careful before she continued with her playing." - I happily added.

"Absolutely. She's developed a sense, an act and a quality of kindness and empathy that's very mature for her age. We're all very impressed and Margaret is one of the most popular kids here because of that. She is well loved by all her friends!" - Vanessa continued.

From that day on, I continued to observe Bing Bing. I often even created situations to explore how she would react. She never failed - kindness is really embedded in this child. She never leave anyone alone when they are in pain, in need or in misery. Sometimes she just automatically helped adults and kids who just dropped something on the ground, who was trying to get something near her etc. She sacrifices her own wants, needs and priorities to attend care for others. That is a very difficult thing to do even for adults, as especially difficult for a toddler whose sole purpose is to get what they want. I am happy but also concerned. A tiny thought came to my mind - will her friends be kind to Bing Bing as well? - what happens if a child is aggressive towards Bing Bing?

It took a little longer for me to find out. We went to Alan's colleague's house one day for a play date. Lucy was a 3 year old girl who didn't spend much time in childcare. She was not particularly sociable and friendly as a result (that's just my guess). But Lucy had one of the most amazing indoor slides. They were both excited to get on but Lucy didn't seem to understand the concept of taking turns - one of the most important concepts that children have to learn in kindergarten! Lucy kept pushing Bing Bing and I thought that my kind little girl would just give in but Bing Bing stopped Lucy and said this pretty loudly:

"Hey! Hey! No pushing okay! Don't push me!" - Bing Bing was annoyed.

That was a very pleasant surprise for me and Alan - not quite so pleasant for Lucy's parents.

Lucy still didn't get it. I guess this concept does take a lot of time to master!

"HEY! NO PUSHING! IT'S MY TURN! GO AWAY!" - Bing Bing was really pissed.

I didn't want to make the situation awkward so I explained to Bing Bing that Lucy didn't go to a kindergarten, she was not used to having friends and sharing toys with others and that maybe Bing Bing could find something else to play and give Lucy some time playing with the slide by herself. Bing Bing could come back in a short while once Lucy's finished playing.

Bing Bing decided to go off and play with Lucy's sister - a 10-month-old baby. Bing Bing had a great time!

Yesterday, Bing Bing was in a music class, she was sitting in the teacher's chair with so much pride. A 3 year old girl, Reeya, approached Bing Bing showing her interest in the teacher's chair. Bing Bing moved her bottom to one side and patted her hand down on the other - suggesting that they both share the chair. For some reason Bing Bing got out of the chair to climb back up again but Reeya saw an opportunity and sat down on the chair quickly - claiming the whole seat.

Alan and I were watching from afar and thought "Oh, Bing Bing is going to get her "Hey! Hey!" at the girl now, isn't she?". Surprisingly, Bing Bing smiled at the girl (who just took her seat!). Bing Bing ran to an electric socket on the wall, about 2 metres away and started exploring. Reeya was watching and following Bing Bing to see what she was looking at. Once Reeya reached the socket and kneeled down, Bing Bing picked up her fastest running speed back to the chair and claim the seat with a biggest smile at Reeya. - Điệu hổ Ly sơn??

"Man! She's one clever girl! Awesome tactics to problem solve this situation" - Alan exclaimed next to me (whose mouth was wide open).

I remember one saying "Don't take my kindness as coward-ness!" and Bing Bing has showed me just that. Now my worries have gone. I know for a fact that Bing Bing has both, like Cinderella's mother once said to her child "Be kind and have courage". Something I have to learn too.

A proud mother :)

Month 28: A warmest cold winter morning

7am
I was dreaming Bing Bing calling "Mama! Mamaaa!". It was getting louder and clearer. Sh!t it wasn't a dream. Bing Bing was calling me from her bedroom. That was how a day started.

"What is it, honey? You're up? Good morning."

" Good morning, Mommy" - She grins.

I ran from my bedroom to hers without much clothes on and it was a very cold winter day.

"It's so cold Bing Bing" - I pulled her blanket up my shoulders.

"Oh, are you cold Mommy? Am I cold Mommy?" - Her facial expression was serious.

"I'm a bit cold. But I think you're hot Bing Bing. Your heater was on the whole night."

"Yes I am hot, are you hot Mommy?" - She reached her tiny hand and placed it on my forehead.

"Now that you have examined me, do you think I'm hot Bing Bing?" I smiled.

"No, you're not hot Mommy. I am hot. Is Daddy hot too?" - She pointed at the door.

"I don't think he is. Actually he might even be cold."

"Daddy is cold. Are you tired Mommy?" She asked as I yawned.

"I am not tired Bing Bing. I am still sleepy I guess." I briefly closed my eyes.

"Oh, do you want to sleep on my bed? Lay down Mommy. Lay down here." She ordered while pushing me down onto her bed.

Bing Bing covered me with her favourite blanket. She pulled it down to cover both my feet. When only my head was exposed she gave me a big warm hug and murmurs:

"Are you still cold Mommy?"

"I think I'm getting warmer. Maybe just need one kiss to feel perfect." I tempted.

She leaned on and gave me a kiss on my lips.

Suddenly she went to her nightstand and grabbed a nappy.

"Do you want me to change your nappy Mommy?" Her eyes wide opened.

"No thank you darling. I don't need a nappy because I can go to the toilet."

"Oh, you want to go to the toilet now Mommy? Okay! Come!" She opened the door and dragged me to the toilet as she spoke.

"It's too cold Mommy" - She realised that only her room was warm enough to wear a night dress that she was wearing.

"I know, let's come back in Bing Bing.". She agreed.

As I changed her nappy and outfit, she asked

" I am hungry Mommy. Di an di thoi! Di an khoai lang di thoi!"

After Bing Bing brushed her teeth and cleaned her face all by herself, we went downstairs and Alan was preparing lunchboxes. Bing Bing had her usual favourite Kumara and she sang "Let it Go" from Frozen for about 10 times.

It was one of the longest conversations that we exchanged. It was warm and full of love and care. I cherished all conversations we had because I knew she only grows up once and I only grow old once.

Much love

Your Mommy

Month 28: Stories from school

8.30AM – 5.30PM

9 hours!

No, I am not talking about my working hours here. This is in fact the number of hours that Bing-Bing stays at her kindy from Monday to Friday. Bing-Bing sleeps for about 11-12 hours at night, which effectively means that we have just about 3 hours left to directly interact with our daughter on a daily basis. I am always curious about what Bing-Bing does at school, and one of my biggest wishes was to become invisible to watch Bing-Bing play and learn without distracting her. While waiting for my wish to come true, Alex and I usually spent time catching up with Bing-Bing’s teachers, and their stories as well as observations have made us smile every time. In this entry, let me start by telling my favorite stories first.

#1 – A lovely SMS

Bing-Bing is the smallest toddler at her (new) kindy and she had her first class exactly a day after her second birthday. We were so worried on that day that Bing-Bing would not settle in well. Before lunch, we received a short SMS with a photo attached, saying “Margaret is having a good time matching all the boxes. Don’t worry too much” from her teacher. Since our first transition visit, I always had an intuition that Bing-Bing would like her new kindy and that timely and thoughtful SMS simply made my day. Every now and then I still texted Bing-Bing's teacher to see what my Bing-Bing was up to.

#2 – Show n Tell

Friday morning was the time for “Show and Tell” at Bing-Bing’s kindy and the kids took turn to present anything they wanted to their friends. For example, a little girl was really excited about her first flight, so her parents printed out her ticket and she proudly presented it. A boy even showed his caterpillar and explained how it evolved to be a butterfly (I don’t like this caterpillar part very much but strangely enough, the kids do). We often asked Bing-Bing what she would like to ‘show and tell’ and helped her prepare accordingly. More importantly, we were always keen to know how it went from her teachers.

During the first few weeks, Bing-Bing was shy standing in front a big crowd (evidenced by the fact that she either put her finger or even her whole hand into her mouth), but she was more confident sharing her stories with a smaller audience. Well, I guess that's normal. Public speaking was the number one fear even in America (drowning only made top 4), let alone Bing-Bing was only two years old. All we need is just a little patience together with a lot of practice.

Last week, Bing-Bing wanted to tell her friends about her handmade butterfly and dragonfly. When we arrived at 5PM, Mona greeted us with a warm smile and instantly told us about Bing-Bing’s “Show and Tell”: 

Mona: Margaret was much more confident presenting her "show and tell" this morning and she put no finger into her mouth.

Alan: Oh wow, well done Margaret

Mona: We still needed to ask her questions but she managed to answer all of them with good sentences. A girl even asked Margaret “Why are you showing us these?” and she answered “I made it with my Daddy and Mommy”

Alan:  Even nailed the Q&A session!

Practice makes Perfect. I often played the game "Opposites" with Bing-Bing and encouraged her to be Confident, not Shy. In his book "Outliers", M Gladwell suggested that it should take 10,000 hours of practice to achieve mastery in a field. We would continue to work on this, for sure. 

#3 – Margaret’s table

Bing-Bing was sick and she stayed at home with us for two days. I wondered whether the kids at school realized that she was away and whether they missed their little friend Margaret at all. Alex was kind enough to voice up my little concern to a teacher.

Alex: We just wonder whether the kids realized that Margaret was away. Alan had this question on our way here.

Mona: Yes, they did. They kept asking where Margaret was. During lunch, everyone realized that Margaret's seat was vacant and they'd like to keep it vacant the whole time.

Alan: Oh where is her seat?

Mona: It’s right here. We set her on this small table with two other children, so she can be less chatty and focus on her lunch. In the large table, she just chats away.

My interpretation of all this was that my little girl is pretty popular and chatty at school. More importantly, this was a good sign that Bing-Bing could socialize and communicate with other toddlers (who were 1 to 3 years older than her). 

 

#4 – "I am a big girl"

When I said Bing-Bing was the smallest baby in her class, that's not entirely true. Actually, that honor should go to Pablo, a 8-month old baby with big blue eyes and the second cutest smile. His mother was the Assistant Manager of the kindy and she brought Pablo to her work everyday. It just happened that Pablo had an Avent milk bottle that looked exactly the same as the one we brought for Bing-Bing. She usually drinks from a cup already, most of the time, she only uses her non-spill bottle in the car.

One morning Bing didn't finish her milk bottle in the car so she carried around when she got to school. And this conversation happened…
 

Matilda (4 years old): Margaret, why do you hold Pablo’s bottle?

Bing-Bing: It’s mine.

Matilda (a bit confused): So are you a baby?

Bing-Bing (in her serious face): No no Bing Bing is not a baby. I am a big girl. Big girl!

As per the teacher, Bing-Bing then repeated her sentence “I am a big girl” for about ten minutes and insisted to drink milk from a cup to make her point. She now refused to drink from her bottle at home or in the car. This little girl is, to quote Alex, “quite a character”…

For years, researchers have tried to explain whether a person is born with personalities or whether the world around us shaped who we are. Well, the debate is still going on out there but I myself chose the easy answer – Both. I still wish to be invisible to watch Bing-Bing in action at school, to know more about that part of the world that is shaping her.

AP

Month 28: Just a Sunday afternoon

It was a fine Sunday afternoon. 3:30pm and Alan was already at his usual badminton games. I decided to watch a movie while Bing Bing was still having her afternoon nap. Then I heard the familiar noise that her bedroom door made when it was opened. By the time I opened my bedroom door, here was Bing Bing running across the corridor at lightning speed. She was too short to look over our bed through all those pillows and blankets so she had her eyes fully opened - they were as large and big as longan stones. She turned around and spoke in her clearest voice:

"Is Daddy sleeping on the bed now Mommy? Daddy is sleeping on the bed?"

"Ba đi chơi cầu lông rồi Bing ạ. Chơi cầu lông đó con biết không? Như thế này này." - I tried to explain to her with some awkward badminton imitation.

"Oh, Daddy be home soon Mommy? Daddy be home now?" - Her eyes got bigger and blacker as she tried to raise her eyebrows.

"Ba sẽ về sớm thôi, giờ có 2 mẹ con mình ở nhà thôi"

"Ba đi cầu lông... Pew pew... haha... Daddy home soon Mommy."

"That's right. You want some ice-cream?"

She was finally satisfied with that and happy went downstairs with me to have some ice-cream. She was only allowed to have ice-cream every Sunday afternoon after her lunch nap and she could eat as much as she liked.

To have some fun and to make sure that she has a safe way going down the stairs given how small she was and how short her legs are, I often went first - down the flight of stairs using not my adult legs but my bottom. She went after, she laughed every time I banged my butt on each stair but she asked "Are you alright Mommy?" every time I landed hard on my bottom. She did the same thing, we had fun and she had never fell off the stairs. Of course, at the last one, she counted "1, 2, 3 Jump!" and jumped off the last step with a big laugh.

After having so much ice-cream, she held her cheeks up and said

"So cold Mommy...".

I laughed out loud. She laughed after me and I asked

"Why are you laughing Bing Bing?".

I thought she would just ignore my difficult question (for her age) but she replied

"Bing Bing is so funny".

It was playtime. She had a wide range of choices. She picked building blocks. They were new toys I bought for her and she absolutely loved it. While I was trying to follow the instruction booklet to build a shrimp, she was already on her mission to build what she called "My Tara Tree". She built one, then two. I needed one particular yellow piece that she was using so I politely asked:

"Bing cho mẹ mượn cái này nhé." - Thought she would.

"Erm... no, I need this. Sorry Mommy" - I WAS surprised. But I was glad. When Bing Bing and her kindy friends were playing along side with one another, I used to teach Bing Bing that it was important to share toys but only after you have finished playing with that toy. It would not be a healthy friendship if one can just take things from you and say you have to share. And same thing for Bing Bing, she learned to wait for her turn to use toys.

I showed her my beautiful shrimp.

"Wow, well done Mommy. It's so cool". - Smiling as she spoke

I was surprised again. "Since when did you have such great people skills Bing Bing?". I wasn't very good at that. It was really special to see that I could even teach her something I didn't have myself.

I screamed on top of my lung. Alan appeared out of nowhere behind us without making a single sound as we were attentively watching Frozen "Let it go" song. I thought somebody broke in our house and suddenly appeared in front of us with a knife. Thankfully it was just Alan. Bing Bing heard me scream. She was surely calm, certainly calmer than her mother. She gave me a hug and said "Mommy is scared Daddy". She gave me a kiss on the lips and held my face up. For a second I felt like she was an eleven year old daughter that I could count on.

We went to the supermarket after that and that was my 2 hours with Bing Bing on a Sunday afternoon. She has grown so much since her second birthday. I now have a better idea of who Bing Bing is and who this young girl that she is capable of becoming.


Alex